“Before, my parents forbade me something, now my wife does. When will I grow up?”
The film “What Men Talk About” performed by “Quartet I” can easily be called one of the best comedies of modern Russian cinema. A tasty cocktail of an unobtrusive script, good acting, and excellent humor found a response not only among the male audience for whom it was intended, but also among the female audience, who are for the most part the object of this very humor.
Below are our favorite quotes from this wonderful film.
Previously, everything was clear: did your homework - good job, took your grandmother across the road - smart, broke the glass with a ball - bad. And now: he did something good for one woman, but it made another woman feel bad. And you actually did everything for the third one. But she doesn’t care!
While you are wooing her, a woman, she is beautiful. But now you live together, she goes to work in the morning and says: “You are my unshaven little one” - or even like this: “You are my sleepy Cheburashka” ... No, no: “Chebura-a-fka.” And it seems so cute, but so disgusting.
- And the fact that “sleepy and unshaven Cheburashka” is a stretch.
- No, Lesh, this is “natya-ya-fka.”
- “That’s it, see you in the evening, smack!” - Well, what the hell are “smacks”? If you want to kiss, kiss!
Why, when she shouts from the next room: “Abu-bu-bu-bu... Green slippers” - I ask her: “What?”, and she tells me: “Green slippers!”... Well, why she repeats exactly these last two words that I heard?! How does she succeed?!
- “And the toast in our restaurant is called croûton.” It's the same piece of toasted bread, but the crouton can't cost $8, but the croûton can. And then you start looking for at least some taste that distinguishes this crouton from crouton. And you find it!
And the plate is so huge... Probably this is to emphasize that there is very little deflop on Earth.
In general, it began to not coincide: how I want to what to do and how Right enroll. And you want it to be right, but you want it to be the way you want it... And? What to do?
But take the question “Why?” When I tell her: “Come to my place,” and she tells me: “Why?” Now, explain what I should answer her? After all, I don’t have a bowling alley or a movie theater at home. If I say: “Let’s make love once or twice, it will definitely be good for me, maybe for you, and then you can stay, but it’s better if you leave,” she definitely won’t go. Although he understands perfectly well that this is exactly what we are going for. And I say: “Come to me - I have a wonderful collection of lute music from the 16th century.” And this answer completely suits her.
A crisis is when you don’t want anything and then you start wanting to want something.
- That's okay. When you don’t want to want to want something, that’s a crisis.
- This is not a crisis, this is a p[ip]t!
One of the works of “Quartet I” can rightfully be called one of the best films recent years. A film that will be close to everyone with its jokes, dialogues and situations. The entire hour and a half can be parsed into quotes, which is exactly what we did.
The best quotes about life from What Men Talk About
1. Previously, everything was clear: I did my homework - well done, took my grandmother across the road - smart, broke the glass with a ball - bad. And now: he did something good for one woman, but it made another woman feel bad. And you did everything for the third one. But she doesn’t care!
2. - While you are wooing her, a woman, she is beautiful. But now you live together, she goes to work in the morning and says: “You are my unshaven one.” Or even like this: “You are my sleepy Cheburashka”... No, no: “Chebura-a-fka.” And it seems so cute, but so disgusting. - And the fact that “sleepy and unshaven Cheburashka” is a stretch. - No, Lesh, this is “natya-ya-fka.”
3. “Okay, see you tonight, smack!” Well, what the hell are “smacks”? If you want to kiss, kiss!
4. Why, when she shouts from the next room: “abu-bu-bu-bu... green slippers,” I ask her: “What?”, and she tells me: “Green slippers!”... Well, why does she repeat exactly these the last two words I heard?! How does she do this?!
5. “And the toast in our restaurant is called croûton.” It's the same piece of toasted bread, but the crouton can't cost $8, but the croûton can. And then you start looking for at least some taste that distinguishes this crouton from crouton. And you find it!
6. And the plate is so huge... Probably this is to emphasize that there is very little deflop on Earth.
7. In general, it has become inconsistent: what you want to do and how to do it right. And you want it to be right, but you want it to be the way you want it... And? What to do?
8. But take the question “Why?” When I tell her: “Come to my place,” and she tells me: “Why?” Now, explain what I should answer her? After all, I don’t have a bowling alley or a movie theater at home. If I say: “Let’s make love once or twice, it will definitely be good for me, maybe for you, and then you can stay, but it’s better if you leave,” she definitely won’t go. Although he understands perfectly well that this is exactly what we are going for. And I say: “Come to me - I have a wonderful collection of lute music from the 16th century.” And this answer completely suits her.
10. - A crisis is when you don’t want anything, and then you start wanting to want something. - That's okay. When you don’t want to want to want something, that’s a crisis. - This is not a crisis, this is f***!
11. When I was 14 years old, I thought that 40 years was so far away that it would never happen. Or it will be, but not for me. But now I’m almost 40, and I understand that it really won’t happen! Because I’m still 14. It turns out there are no adults. There are older children. Bald, sick, gray-haired boys and girls.
12. Why can only your wife or husband cheat on you? Why can't you cheat on your children? Just imagine, you were seen leaving McDonald's with someone else's child...
13. Now, if the fascists, who shoot for lies, came and asked: “Did your wife cheat on you or not?” In any case, I would have answered “no,” because if you didn’t cheat, you told the truth, they let you go, and if you cheated, then you won’t even have time to be surprised. But you said: “Yes, I cheated,” and it turned out to be true. You were released, live, but how to live with this? You know, she knows that you know, all the fascists know, you can’t call them anymore - it’s awkward, but the guys were helpful... And if everything rested on the fact that you “don’t know”, and she’ll leave now, and you love her ... Ay...
14. Or she asks some question. And I see that this is really very important for her. And I start answering. And she’s already gone. It turns out that it was simply important for her to ask this question and that’s all...
15. In general, when you’re married, what’s annoying is not that you don’t have other women, but that there’s no possibility of other women. I might not have taken advantage of it, but there must be an opportunity... For example, they would forbid you to eat with a fork. And in the wording “never”. “You will never eat with a fork again!” Yes, it would seem, to hell with it, you can do it with a spoon, chopsticks, hands... But they told you - you can’t, and you immediately wanted to use a fork. And, most importantly, here it is - the fork, lying there. Lots of forks. I opened the box - it was full.
16. This is because there are no objective criteria in art. Everything in sports is objective. I ran the fastest 100-meter dash - that’s it, you’re great, a winner, a champion. And no one is interested in your running style, even backwards. “Somehow he didn’t run conceptually.” Fuck you, run like that yourself! “Eh, no, what did he want to say with those nine and a half seconds?” Why the hell are you running like that! That's all.
17. There is no future. Previously, in childhood, there was something bright and unknown ahead. Life... And now I know exactly what will happen next. The same as today. I will do the same things, go to the same restaurants, well, or to others like them. Driving a car is about the same. Instead of the future, it became the present. There is simply a present, which is now, and a present, which will be later. And the main thing is that I like my present. The cars are good, the restaurants are delicious - I just feel sorry for the future...
18. For example, if a man likes a woman, he must conquer her, and if a woman likes a man, she... she must surrender to him. That is, lose. Loses while winning. We play checkers. They play giveaway... Crooked female logic... It’s always like that with them.
19. - And here’s why: they drank the same thing, but one of them stinks in the morning, and the other smells slightly? - This is called inner intelligence.
This is because there are no objective criteria in art. In sports, everything is objective - you ran the fastest 100-meter dash - that's it - you're great, a winner, a champion!.. and no one is interested in your running style, even backwards. “Somehow he didn’t run conceptually...” - fuck you, you ran like that yourself “no, no, what did he want to say with those 9.5 seconds of his” - that you’ll just run like that - that’s all.
The whole point is that there is good in every person - whether you see it or not depends on you.
In this world I value only loyalty. Without this, you are nothing and you have no one. In life, this is the only currency that will never depreciate.
Until you are able to say no, your yes is meaningless.
This is life. Everything is always the same: one is waiting for the other, but he is not there. Someone always loves more than they love him. And the hour comes when you want to destroy what you love so that it no longer torments you.
When you know what is written on Wikipedia, this is not real erudition. True erudition is when you know something that is not there.
Believing that you can does not help as much as believing that it is impossible to do it hinders you.
Style is what you carry within yourself, not what you buy.
Live the way you want, not the way others expect you to live. It doesn’t matter whether you live up to their expectations or not, you will die without them. And you will win your victories yourself!
The content didn't work out for me. Almost. Among Haydor's brave memories, scars and skirmishes at every turn, references to other stories, the thread of the plot is interrupted - it does not seem solid and strong. The ending is completely gone without saying goodbye. The story is written to be written. And this is sad.
I remember a phrase from the miracle film: “Somehow he didn’t run conceptually!”
Narration:
1. “the world of the dead, which is called the Other World and will let the army of evil into our home” - a comma is required after clarification.
2. “protector from unclean creatures and Ser Thorel” - who the Sers of Thorel are is unknown. The second time it became clear that the comma had moved away.
3. “there was a famous besogon and he was famous” - it was repeated quite a bit.
4. “After the execution, in one of the taverns called “White Dove” people are drinking merrily” - the participle is not highlighted.
5. “the hands looked creepy, which caught my grandfather’s attention” - the phrase is lame. It would be better “which is what my grandfather paid attention to.”
6. “the Bearded Grandfather said” - why is the definition capitalized?
7. “He’s kind of strange... and he didn’t take off his hood,” said the fat man, finishing his ale.” - spaces are needed after the dash. And direct speech ends with a comma before the description in dialogues. And the participle is framed with commas if it is in the middle of a sentence. But here it is at the end, so one is missing.
8. “... took a sip from the mug and continued - why should I like your story?” - Direct speech in dialogues after the description continues with a capital letter.
9. “continued the fat man” - no period.
10. “what caused it to fall to the floor” - “fell.”
11. “But you asked... - the cabin boy answered
-Now I ask you to go to hell! “Haydor said, waking up a little.”
- please decide on the format of the dialogues. It is desirable that they comply with the rules of the Russian language.
12. “moved from a lying position to a sitting position” - moved...
13. “The weights were shaved off” - whiskey as a drink. Please remember.
14. "Haydor put on his shirt, and then somehow pulled on his pants,<...>, and then hung a musket and a couple of bags on his belt..." - then = after = later.
15. "a sword with an engraved spell. The spell was written" - repeat.
16. "-Not so often... about 5 times." and “when I was 7” - all numerals are written in words.
17. “Red city... a beautiful place,” said Jimmy
“Do you know that the Red City was founded” - if the Red City is the name, then why the differential spelling - with capitals and not?
18. “the creator of the red city had a very red ass” - hmm... Superfluous.
19. “took out a sword and put the sword” - don’t do that.
20. "Entering the palace, Heidor was met by a herald." - who entered the palace - Heidor or the herald? It turns out that the second one.
21. “Wait here!” said the herald and ran away a little further along the corridor.” - past tense.
“The king sits on the throne, waiting for Haydor...” - present tense.
- Paragraphs stand one after another.
22. “Let him come in!” Wedekind 2 ordered “my eyes!”
...here I felt despondent due to errors in the text...
23. “Haydor has already entered the hall without asking.” - extra comma.
24. “We could have waited!” - similar.
25. “Queen, you...,” said the queen’s adviser, who came next
-Idiots! Be silent! Only he can save my daughter! - The queen screamed" - design.
26. “Haydor looked at the curtains that did not let in the sunlight. Besogon approached the curtains.”
27. “Haydor looked at the curtains that did not let in the sunlight. Besogon approached the curtains.” - curtains, curtains, curtains...
28. “the knife in the jamb created some kind of barrier” - “created”?
29. “Haydor immediately turned around” - toot toot toot.
Anything to add?:
Dear author,
I understand your indignation in response to my review. But you must understand me - it was difficult to read, there was no integrity in the plot, and the addition of obscenities did not add any charm to your work. If you want to create more meaningful fiction, you must be respectful of your language, and of the reader first. It was not possible to get any satisfaction from your work.
And ideally, do you really think that a narrative like this could achieve any kind of victory? This question should have been asked immediately before submitting the work to the competition.
Work hard.
She unfairly offended you - you were rightfully offended and left. Fine!
- Well, what are we going to give?
- Maybe something inexpensive and effective...
- $500 - inexpensive and very impressive.
And so he accomplished a feat for her sake. But when was this? And once. And he scratches all the time...
There is no need to try to make your dream come true. Let it remain a dream.
Why do you need a road if you can’t get a grandmother across it?
I noticed that her boots were more worn out on one side and you thought to yourself - She’s crooked. Then you think, okay, it’s like that for you too, but this word is clubfoot... But she’s a dream...
It seems to me that leftist connections are condemned mainly by those people who cannot have them themselves.
- Don’t worry, you want to figure it out. Normal means everything. Because a crisis is when you don’t want anything. And then you start wanting to want something.
- That's okay. When you don’t want to want to want something, that’s a crisis.
- This is not a crisis, this is FUCK!
- Come out with Herk (with the dog)!
- What should I do: go out with Herc, order a taxi or get a divorce?
Then Romeo and Juliet. It turns out it's good that they died. After all, they overcame so much for the sake of their love. Would her love, say, have endured it if she had found out that he was saying “calling”? Or that he throws socks all over the apartment?
J.F. - I love you, Vyacheslav Gavrilovich.
V.G. - But I don’t like you. Dear Zhanna Friske, control yourself...
“As long as you’re wooing her (the woman), she’s beautiful.” But now you live together, she leaves for work in the morning and says:
“You’re my unshaven little one” or even like that “You’re my sleepy Cheburashka”, no-no... Chebura-a-fka. And it seems so cute, but so disgusting.
- And the fact that he’s sleepy, unshaven, Cheburashka is a stretch.
- No, Lyosh, this is “natya-ya-fka.”
There was no future. Previously, as a child, there was always something bright and unknown ahead. Life! And now I know exactly what will happen next - the same as today. I will do the same things, go to the same restaurants, well, to others the same. Driving a car is about the same. Instead of the future, the present has become, simply, there is the present, which is now, and the present, which will be later. And the main thing is that I like my present. The cars are good, the restaurants are delicious... but I feel sorry for the future...
A film or performance can always be stopped at some good moment. What about life? If only she always had a happy ending. Not “died,” because “died” is a bad ending. For example, you’re walking along the embankment, it’s a beautiful day... and suddenly, over the horizon, the credits begin to slowly rise. You say: “What is this? Is that all? Wait, wait a second, who played me? Did you play well? Well, I hope you liked everything, because well, everything ended wonderfully...” That's how it would be.
- Sanya, but there’s one thing you don’t know. How do you say Hungary in Ukrainian?
- How?! I know, Hungary.
- No, Sasha. Ugorshchina!
- How do they live there?
— Where in Ukraine or Hungary?
- in Ugorshchina?!
- Sasha! Go out into the yard for a walk! We're on a swing!
This is because there are no objective criteria in art. In sports, everything is objective - you ran the fastest 100-meter dash - that's it - you're great, a winner, a champion!.. and no one is interested in your running style, even backwards. “Somehow he didn’t run conceptually...” - fuck you, you ran like that yourself “no, no, what did he want to say with those 9.5 seconds of his” - that you’ll run the hell like that - that’s all.
- ABOUT! Elders! This is where we'll spend the night.
- I can't!
- Why?
- IM married. I can’t go to Beldyazhki...
- Can you imagine how pleasant it is to refuse in such a situation? She came... all... Zhanna Friske. She came and said: “I love you!”, And he said to her: “But I don’t love you!”
He took revenge on all the women in her person! For youthful acne, for the girl in the ninth grade who did not go to dance with you, for the third year student who fell asleep at the very important point, drunken fool!
- Was there such a thing?
- Well, it was, right? Was? Look me in the eye! I see what happened!
- There was nothing why I would have told you then.
- Uh-huh... Well, we kissed, right? Kissed!
- Yes, we didn’t kiss at all.
- Uh-huh... I understood: you pestered her, and she refused you!
“I’m telling you, she was the one who pestered me, and I refused...
- What... really didn’t happen? Refused? Zhanna Friske?
- Well, you're an asshole...
In general, I’m not going “to”, but “from”!
- They are 80 years old, that is, they lived together for 60 years. And you can see, you can see, you can see that they love each other.
- Do they love you? Why do you think that they didn’t cheat on each other? Maybe that’s why they lived so long and happily. Well, because they changed it. Isn't that what happens?
- No. It doesn't happen that way.
- Why?
- Because. Because I don't want it that way.
- But why? Did you drink the same thing, but one stinks in the morning, and the other smells a little?
- It's called “Inner Intelligence”!
Why, when she asks me a question from another room, this, you know, like: “abu-bu-bu-bu-bu... GREEN SLIPPERS!?” I ask: “What?” She says: “GREEN SLIPPERS!” Why does she repeat exactly what I heard?! These last two words. How does she do it?
In general, it began to not coincide: what you want to do and how to do it right. But I want it to be as it should be, but I want it to be the way I want it to be... And what should I do?
She doesn’t have a phone so that she can be contacted, but so that it’s in her purse, ringing, but she doesn’t hear it.
But take the question “Why?” When I tell her: “Come to my place,” and she says: “Why?”, explain what I should answer her? After all, I don’t have a bowling alley or a movie theater at home. If I say: “Let’s make love once or twice, it will definitely be good for me, maybe for you, and then you can stay, but it’s better if you leave.” She definitely won’t go, although she understands perfectly well that this is exactly what we are going for. And I say: “Come to me, I have a wonderful collection of lute music from the 16th century.”
- Listen, why can only your wife or husband cheat on you? Why can’t you change, for example, children?
- That is?
- Well, imagine you were seen leaving McDonald's with someone else's child, huh?
“Or your child found a Lego check in your pocket.” And you didn’t buy him Lego...
- Or bought an unknown child on the street... ice cream. Nothing serious, just a heartfelt impulse. And your children noticed it.
- Yes, and your child also asks you this: “Okay, dad! You know him, huh?”
- And you’re like: “No, I just bought ice cream, honestly...” - “Yes? And what time did you just buy him ice cream, huh?”
- “What’s wrong with that? Fuck you, boy! I'm telling you, I... I'm seeing him for the first time, look at him! Fuck you, boy!!!"
- "Better! The first time he sees a person, he immediately gets ice cream! By the way, I haven’t seen ice cream in years!”
- Yes... And that’s all; and in the morning - the cupboards are empty, there are no toys and a note: “Goodbye. From kindergarten Mom will pick us up! Boo..."
- Sash, you’re a goat and a freak, but what does that change?
Or she asks some question. And I see that this is really very important for her. And I start answering. And she’s already gone. It turns out that it was simply important for her to ask this question and that’s all... And also, you know, I realized what the most important answer to the question “Why?” - "Because!"
“I went. Smacks” Well, what the hell are smacks?! If you want to kiss, kiss.
Over time, the question arose: “Why?”
Before they told you: “Listen, I met two girls, their apartment is available in Otradnoye, let’s sit and have a drink! Go!" You went straight away. If you were asked “Why?”, you would say: “How, why? What are you, a fool? Two girls, separate apartment! Let's sit and have a drink, okay?!"
And now... they tell you “let’s go,” and you think: “Some two girls... leftists. Their apartment is in OT-RAD-NOM! This means going there, drinking with them... then either staying, or going home... tomorrow to work. For what?!"
In general, when you’re married, what’s annoying is not that you don’t have other women, but that you don’t have this opportunity. I might not have taken advantage of it, but there must be an opportunity... For example, they would forbid you to eat with a fork. And in the wording “never”. “You will never eat with a fork again!” Yes, it would seem, to hell with it, you can use a spoon, chopsticks, hands... But they told you - you can’t, and you immediately wanted to use a fork. And, most importantly, here it is - the fork, lying there. Lots of forks. I opened the box and it was full. Different - long, short, three-pronged, two-pronged, silver, cupronickel... Yes, even an aluminum fork would do for you in this condition... if you haven’t had a single fork for three years. But you can't. And just yesterday it was still possible - take any fork and use it, and no one will care. And now I’ve used it - and everyone is shaking their heads: “Eh, what, you promised not to use forks...
- Don't open the windows!
- It’s so stuffy...
- Mosquitoes will fly!
- We'll turn off the lights...
- Cockroaches will come!
- Maybe because you're an asshole?
- Yes? I somehow didn't think about it. Good version. Explains a lot.
Everything was clear before. Did your homework - well done, took your grandmother across the road - smart, broke the glass with a ball - bad. And now he did good to one woman and bad to another. And you did everything for the third one.
Dreams don't come true at all. At best, you simply achieve your goal.
Previously, my parents forbade me something, now my wife does. When will I grow up?
— Why is Kyiv the mother of Russian cities? No, well, Russians are okay, understandable, but why is Kyiv the mother? He's the father...
- And I'll tell you. This is because Moscow is a port of five seas.
- Dad, I pooped!
- Congratulations!
It turns out there are no adults. There are older children.
For example, if a man likes a woman, he must conquer her, and if a woman likes a man, she... she must surrender to him. That is, lose. Loses while winning. We play checkers. They play giveaway... Crooked female logic... It’s always like that with them.
- Girl, excuse me, but won’t you have sex?
- Oh, sorry, I quit...
