How to behave in a conflict situation. How to behave in conflict situations: advice from a psychologist. What methods of dispute resolution exist?

Conflict situations occur quite often in the life of every person. It doesn't matter whether you are a bullying person or a peace-loving person, conflicts are an inevitable part of our lives. It is unlikely that anyone will be able to avoid contradiction while in human society. How to behave in conflicts?

  • Release of steam. If you do not want to develop a conflict, but, on the contrary, are looking for a way to smooth it out, patiently and calmly listen to all the complaints presented to you, without commenting or interrupting the person. This will reduce internal tension on both sides. If this method helps to maintain calm, then it will be easier to resolve the issue.
  • Substantiation of claims. After the outburst of emotions, if a person is asked to speak out, he will already be ready for a normal conversation. The main thing is that everything does not turn into emotions again; you always need to guide yourself and your interlocutor to intellectual conclusions.
  • Non-standard techniques. Evoking positive emotions in a person is not so difficult. With women in general it is very simple, give her a sincere compliment, remember that deception and flattery are always felt. An anecdote will help defuse the situation with men, but it must be appropriate and related to the conflict that has arisen.
  • Mention your feelings. For example: “It makes me sad this situation" In this way, you remind the person that there are two of you in the conflict, so he needs to defend not only his point of view, but also accept yours.
  • Collaborative formulation of the problem. As practice shows, both sides see the essence of the dispute differently, and accordingly they do not understand each other. To achieve agreement, you need to come to a common understanding. To find common points understanding, you need to explain to everyone how he sees the problem, then discuss the final result that you would like to achieve.
  • Respect. If you show respect to an angry interlocutor, you will make a positive impression on him. Let's evaluate his actions, but don't touch his personality.
  • Attention. Ask the person again whether you understood each other correctly, how he sees a way out of this current situation. Such questions should reduce aggression.
  • Stay on equal footing. Try to maintain calm confidence all the time, no need to break into screaming or swearing. If you are to blame, apologize, do not think that in this way you will show your weakness. Only smart and mature people are capable of apologizing.

How parents should behave in conflict situations with children

  • Ignore bad behavior. Parents, paying attention to their child’s bad behavior, themselves encourage it. It doesn't matter whether the attention is positive or negative, most often only the complete absence of it can solve the problem of your child's misbehavior.
  • Go away. If your child has gotten you into such a state that you are starting to lose control and become very nervous, take some time off to recover. This will calm down both you and your child.
  • A red herring. Keep your child busy to avoid escalating the conflict situation. Just keep in mind that this method will only work if your child has not yet become capricious to the point that you can no longer reach him.
  • Find the positives. Children, just like adults, do not like to be criticized; they feel irritated and offended. As a result, after criticism, they will not make contact. However, you also cannot do without criticism; try to soften it, then the child will more easily perceive everything you say.
  • Talk to your child calmly, try to listen to him and understand how he feels.

After a conflict, no matter how it ends, there will be an unpleasant aftertaste. We advise you to let him go, try to forget everything that is happening, and don’t dwell on the troubles.

Each of us has to face conflict situations. As the American psychologist B. Wool figuratively noted, “life is a process of resolving an infinite number of conflicts. A person cannot avoid them. He can only decide whether to participate in the development of solutions or leave it to others.” Therefore, every person, especially in business communication, it is necessary to have at least a basic understanding of conflicts and methods of behavior when they arise. Unfortunately, most people are characterized by the inability to find a decent way out of them. In addition, as soon as a conflict arises, and it is always associated with emotions, we begin to experience discomfort and tension, which can even lead to stressful situations, thereby damaging our health. For example, frequent family quarrels, such as special case conflicts cause stress among their participants. Stress is necessarily followed by depression and, trying to find a way out, i.e. to escape the conflict, usually one of the family members, as a rule, resorts to alcohol, drugs or having an affair on the side. Thus, the body tries to protect itself from the approaching disease, which will certainly occur if the conflict cannot be resolved. Inability to resolve conflicts is one of the important reasons for frequent divorces.

Memories of conflicts usually evoke unpleasant associations: threats, hostility, misunderstanding, attempts, sometimes hopeless, to prove that one is right, resentment... As a result, the opinion has developed that conflict is always a negative phenomenon, undesirable for each of us. Conflicts are seen as something that should be avoided if possible.

The modern approach to the essence of conflict considers it as an inevitable, and even in some cases, a necessary element of the organization’s activities.

Nowadays, management theorists and practitioners are increasingly inclined to the point of view that some conflicts, even in the most effective organization with the best relationships, are not only possible, but also desirable, despite the fact that it is nevertheless necessary to regulate them. The role of conflicts and their regulation in modern society so great that in the second half of the twentieth century a special field of knowledge emerged - conflictology. Sociology, philosophy, political science and, of course, psychology made a great contribution to its development.

Conflict is always an interaction between people. Depending on the scale of this interaction, psychological, sociological, political science and geological levels of consideration of conflicts are distinguished.

Concept of conflict

Like many concepts in psychology, conflict has many definitions and interpretations. The very concept of conflict originates from the Latin word “conflictus” - clash. And following etymological meaning of this term, the English sociologist E. Giddens gives the following definition of conflict: “By conflict I mean a real struggle between acting people or groups, regardless of the origins of this struggle and the means mobilized by each side.”

There are four main types of conflicts: intrapersonal conflict, interpersonal conflict, conflict between the individual and the group, and intergroup conflict.

All conflicts have several causes. The main causes of conflict are limited resources to be shared, interdependence of tasks, differences in goals, differences in ideas and values, differences in behavior, level of education, and poor communication.

Five Basic Types of Conflict Personalities

This may seem strange, but here it is appropriate to give one important piece of advice - be sympathetic to people whose typical characteristics are described below. Conflict, which has become a personality trait, is difficult to overcome through rational self-control and willpower. “Educational” influences on the part of the manager are also rarely beneficial here. Conflict is not the fault, but the misfortune of such individuals. A specialist - a practical psychologist - can provide them with real help.

Note: we're talking about not about troublemakers with low morals, but about people who have specific psychological characteristics, determined by the basic properties of individuality.

The conflict personality is a demonstrative type.

Wants to be the center of attention.
Likes to look good in the eyes of others.
His attitude towards people is determined by how they treat him.
He finds it easy to deal with superficial conflicts and admires his suffering and resilience.
Adapts well to different situations.
Rational behavior is poorly expressed. There is emotional behavior.
Planning of one’s activities is carried out situationally and poorly implements it.
Avoids painstaking systematic work.
Does not shy away from conflicts, feels good in situations of conflict interaction.
Often turns out to be a source of conflict, but does not consider himself as such.

A conflict personality is a rigid type.

Suspicious.
Has high self-esteem.
Confirmation of your own importance is constantly required.
Often does not take into account changes in situation and circumstances.
Straightforward and inflexible.
With great difficulty he accepts the point of view of others and does not really take their opinions into account.
Expressions of respect from others are taken for granted.
An expression of hostility on the part of others is perceived by him as an insult.
Uncritical of his actions.

Painfully touchy, hypersensitive to imaginary or real injustices.

Conflict personality - uncontrollable type

Impulsive, lacks self-control.
The behavior of such a number is difficult to predict.
Behaves defiantly and aggressively.
Often in the heat of the moment does not pay attention to generally accepted norms.
Characteristic high level claims.
Not self-critical.
He tends to blame others for many failures and troubles.
Cannot properly plan his activities or consistently implement plans.
The ability to correlate one’s actions with goals and circumstances is not sufficiently developed.
From past experiences (even bitter ones) little benefit is derived for the future.

Conflict personality - ultra-precise type

He is meticulous about his work.
Places higher demands on himself.
He makes high demands on those around him, and does it in such a way that the people he works with feel like they are picking on him.
Has increased anxiety.
Overly sensitive to details.
Tends to attach undue importance to the comments of others.
Sometimes he suddenly breaks off relations with friends and acquaintances because it seems to him that he was offended.
He suffers from himself, experiences his own mistakes and failures, sometimes even paying for them with illnesses (insomnia, headaches, etc.).
Restrained in external, especially emotional manifestations.
Doesn't feel very good about real relationships in the group.

Conflict personality - conflict-free type

Unstable in assessments and opinions.
Has easy suggestibility.
Internally contradictory.
There is some inconsistency in behavior.
Focuses on immediate success in situations.
Doesn't see the future well enough.
Depends on the opinions of others, especially leaders.
Excessively strives for compromise.
Doesn't have enough willpower.
Does not think deeply about the consequences of his actions and the reasons for the actions of others.
A manager has to resolve conflicts not only in the business sphere, but also in the personal and emotional sphere. When resolving them, other methods are used, since in them, as a rule, it is difficult to identify the object of disagreement and there is no conflict of interests.

How to deal with a conflicted person?

1. It must be borne in mind that such people have some hidden needs, which, as a rule, are associated with past losses and disappointments, and they satisfy them in this way. For example, a hyper-aggressive person tries to suppress cowardice and timidity with his aggressiveness. 2. You should take control of your emotions and give vent to the emotions of this person if you intend to continue communicating with him.
3. Don’t take words and behavior personally. this person, knowing that in order to satisfy his interests, a difficult person behaves this way with everyone.
4. When choosing an appropriate style of action in a conflict situation, you should consider what type of person he is. In his book Dealing with Difficult People, Robert Bramson identifies the following types of difficult people with whom he has worked in various firms:

aggressor- speaks rudely and unceremoniously, taunts others and gets irritated if they don’t listen to him. As a rule, behind his aggressiveness lies the fear of revealing his incompetence;

complainant- a person who is seized by some idea and accuses others (someone in particular or the whole world as a whole) of all sins, but does nothing himself to solve the problem; "angry child"- a person belonging to this type is not angry by nature, but an explosion of emotions reflects his desire to take control of the situation. For example, a boss may lose his temper when he feels that his subordinate has lost respect for him;

maximalist- a person who wants something without delay, even if it is not necessary;

silent- keeps everything to himself, doesn’t talk about his grievances, and then suddenly takes it out on someone;

"secret avenger"- a person who causes trouble with the help of some kind of fraud, believing that someone did something wrong, and he restores justice;

"false altruist"- supposedly doing good to you, but deep down regretting it, which can manifest itself in the form of sabotage, demands for compensation, etc.;

"chronic accuser"- always looking for the mistakes of others, believing that he is always right, and blaming can solve the problem.

There are other types of difficult people, but the rules for dealing with them are generally the same.

5. If you consider it necessary to continue communicating with a difficult person, you must insist that the person tell the truth, no matter what. You must convince him that your attitude towards him will be determined by how truthful he is with you and how consistently he will act in the future, and not by the fact that he will agree with you on everything. Thus, in a conflict situation or when communicating with a difficult person, you should try to see in him not only a friend, but also the best qualities. Since you will no longer be able to change either the system of his views and values, or the psychological characteristics of his nervous system, you need to select a “key” for it, based on your life experience and the desire not to complicate the situation and not bring the person to stress. If they couldn’t “find the key” to him, then there is only one way left - to transfer such a person to the category of a natural disaster.

It is useful for a manager to know what individual characteristics personality (character traits) create in a person a tendency or predisposition to conflict relationships with other people. Summarizing the research of psychologists, we can say that such qualities include:
“inadequate self-esteem of one’s capabilities and abilities, which can be either overestimated or underestimated. In both cases, it may contradict the adequate assessment of others - and the ground for conflict is ready;
"the desire to dominate, at all costs, where it is possible and impossible; to have your say the last word;
"conservatism of thinking, views, beliefs, unwillingness to overcome outdated traditions;
“excessive adherence to principles and straightforwardness in statements and judgments, the desire to tell the truth in the eyes at any cost;
"a critical attitude, especially unfounded and unreasoned;
“a certain set of emotional personality traits - anxiety, aggressiveness, stubbornness, irritability.

But a conflict arises if personal characteristics a person or group comes into conflict with the above-mentioned characteristics of a person predisposed to conflicts, that is, in the presence of interpersonal or socio-psychological incompatibility.

As an example, consider incompatible types of temperament under certain conditions. In a normal, calm environment, choleric and phlegmatic people successfully cope with the work assigned to them. In an emergency situation, the slowness of a phlegmatic person, the desire to think about the course of activity and the hot temper, imbalance and fussiness of a choleric person can cause conflict relations between them.

Even more often, differences in needs, interests, and goals become the basis for interpersonal incompatibility. different people, entering into interaction. The main interest, for example, of the head of an established company or enterprise is to expand the business, and for employees - as much money as possible has been allocated for salaries. This creates friction between them, which can lead to conflict even between close people.

Socio-psychological incompatibility can also arise due to the fact that the group or environment makes demands on the individual that diverge from those to which this person is oriented.

Today we will talk about how to behave in conflict situations, which, unfortunately, cannot always be avoided. Even if you are a compliant person, there are individuals who crave confrontation. And you will have to somehow get out of this difficult situation with dignity and with your head held high.

Causes of conflicts

Before you learn how to behave in conflict situations, you should consider where they come from. There are four groups of conflicts:

  1. Objective. External circumstances, labels, an individual's social status, lifestyle - these are examples of objective reasons for the emergence of disagreement. Accepted norms and foundations in society can cause conflicts if they are not perfect, have a weak regulatory function and do not take into account all possible circumstances in interpersonal relationships.
  2. Organizational. This category includes ergonomic, situational, and structural causes of infighting. Disagreement arises due to unorganized human activity. If the structure of an organization does not meet the requirements of the activity in which it is engaged, divisions arise within the workforce and individual groups of people. Mistakes in management are also a source of disagreement.
  3. Socio-psychological factors. Any relationship of an individual in society is determined by his psychological and social attitudinal programs, which often run counter to the opinions of opponents, resulting in conflicts.
  4. Personal, or subjective, directly depend on the individual, his behavior, attitude towards society, and mental characteristics of character.

This is about the reasons. Now let’s figure out how to behave in conflict situations.

Rules of conduct in a dispute with a colleague

If there is a conflict at work, how to behave? One of the parties must adhere to the following recommendations:

  1. Allow your opponent to let off steam. Allow your partner to throw out negative emotions, because in a state of emotional arousal a person is uncontrollable, aggressive, due to overwhelming negativity. Until he calms down, there is no use in saying anything. You must behave quietly, confidently and in no case arrogantly.
  2. Demand a calm explanation. The opponent must be made to understand that information is not perceived in such an emotional presentation. You can cut off aggression using questions: “Are you telling reliable facts, or are you expressing your opinion?”, “Can your statements be unsubstantiated?”
  3. Knock down your anger with sudden tricks. The main task of the reception will be to switch it to positive emotions. For example, you can give a compliment or show sympathy, but only sincerely. Ask for advice, remind about pleasant moments together.
  4. Do not put a negative emphasis on your partner in your address, transfer it to your feelings. For example, you should not say: “You are lying to me,” but rather: “I feel fooled.” Avoid the phrase: “You are rude”; instead, you need to say: “I don’t like the tone in which you talk to me.”
  5. Ask to formulate the problem that needs to be solved. Try to decide on it together and concentrate your attention on it. At the same time, aggression should be removed.
  6. Invite your opponent to give his arguments and his thoughts. Try to reach a consensus.
  7. Whatever happens, do not allow your partner to lose his dignity. Don't be rude in response, don't get personal. Evaluate actions only. You should say: “You have not kept your word for the second time.” It is not recommended to say the phrase: “You don’t give a damn about everything.”
  8. Display statements. For example: “Is that right, did I understand you?”, “Allow me to repeat it to make sure that I understood the information correctly.”
  9. In one position, be at your best. You should not respond with anger to aggression, remain silent, or give in to your opponent. You should remain calm and confident, stick to your position.
  10. If you are guilty, do not hesitate to admit it, ask for forgiveness. This commands respect and shows the maturity and intelligence of your personality, and also disarms your opponent.
  11. You don't need to prove anything. It is necessary to calmly exchange opinions.
  12. Be the first to shut up. This tactic also works and will help you get out of a quarrel and stop it. You just need to do this in such a way that it does not offend your partner or is presented in the form of mockery or challenge.
  13. Don't add fuel to the fire. Avoid the phrases “Why are you angry?”, “Why are you angry?” This will only intensify the conflict.
  14. Come out of disagreements with dignity. When leaving the room, you should not slam the door or say a final offensive phrase.
  15. Wait until your partner calms down. Let your opponent interpret your silence however you like, the main thing is to stop the conflict. And when your partner calms down, you can continue the conversation.
  16. No matter how the conflict ends, try to maintain the relationship. Show respect and agree on the differences that have arisen. If you allow your opponent to “save face,” you will not ruin the partnership.

We looked at tips on how to behave in a conflict situation at work. Now let's talk about strategies. In a dispute, both sides evaluate each other’s interests, compare questions, they say, what he will gain and what he will lose, how important the subject of the dispute is for the opponent. It is the answers that will contribute to the choice of behavior in the dispute.

Strategies

There are:

  1. Care. The strategy is determined by the mutual desire to avoid a dispute.
  2. Agreement. This pattern of behavior demonstrates two-way trade-offs.
  3. Concession. The partner tries not to get involved in a dispute, and does not take into account his interests and does not evaluate them.
  4. Partnership. An individual places his own interests and the opinion of his opponent at a high level. The essence is the equal importance of the points of view of both sides and a conscious assessment of interpersonal relationships.
  5. Compulsion. One’s own interests come first, and one’s opponent’s opinion is, in principle, not of interest.

When interpersonal relationships - partnership, friendship, and so on - are indifferent to one individual, in a dispute he will show aggression and negativity, adhere to the extreme levels of strategy (coercion, struggle, competition). When a partner's interpersonal relationships are good, he exhibits constructive behavior and is inclined to agree, cooperate, withdraw, or yield. So, we briefly looked at strategies on how to behave in a conflict situation.

What methods of dispute resolution exist?

Conventionally divided into two groups:

  1. Negative. Here, all means are used to defend their goal and achieve victory for only one side.
  2. Positive or methods constructive permission conflict is reasonable competition and all types of negotiations.

Often these methods complement one another. And no matter how diverse they are, they still have common characteristics, because at least two people take part in a dispute, where one interferes with the other.

Constructive methods for resolving disputes

The main thing is to remain calm. So, let's look at tips on how a constructive person behaves in a conflict situation. Adviсe:

  1. Identify the opponent from the disagreement. Do not insult, do not humiliate your partner, do not get personal. Evaluate only the words. Point out the mistaken opinion, try to convince them, and maybe you will see your mistake.
  2. Listen to your opponent's opinion. Even if it's wrong, show respect.
  3. Don't interrupt. The ability to listen reduces aggression in an argument to zero. And the skill of persuasion will help resolve the conflict constructively.
  4. Use the “I am statements” technique. Start with the words: “I feel...”, “I think that...”. You need to be flexible and adapt to the situation. Don’t forget about the topic of conversation, find common ground.

The main thing is to control your behavior in conflict situations so as not to provoke your opponent into aggression and anger.

Let's consider the rules of conduct for a leader in a conflict situation.

  1. Keep calm.
  2. Stay neutral.
  3. Look for compromise solutions.
  4. Never hold public proceedings.

We looked at tips on how to behave correctly in a conflict situation for a leader. The outcome of the disagreement will depend on the manager of the company. He needs to learn a lesson and take a number of actions (change job descriptions, issue new decrees, orders, and so on) in order to prevent the emergence of further conflicts. The more often he communicates with subordinates, and conveys to them legal and corporate norms, organizational values, and resolves minor disagreements, major conflicts can be avoided.

How to behave in conflict situations? Methods

It is impossible to do without conflicts in life, so they must be taken for granted. The main thing is to learn how to competently get out of disputes. You need to let your opponent know that you are not an enemy, that you are positive and interested in resolving the disagreement.

Compulsion

This involves using different methods of putting pressure on a partner to accept definite decision, the iron struggle for own opinion, located above someone else’s, while completely ignoring it. This method, as a rule, is used by the manager in order to defend the interests of production, but suppressing the personality of the subordinate can provoke the emergence of a repeated dispute.

Mutual concessions

Involves acceptance of the opponent's opinion. It helps to quickly end the conflict, but often the source of the dispute is not eliminated, which will lead to a new outbreak of conflict.

Evasion

The method works when the opponent can walk away from a dispute if it is inappropriate, or if the conflict gradually resolves itself, or if there is no constructive solution, but there is a prospect of its emergence.

Smoothing

The dispute is not resolved. Sharp corners are simply smoothed out, but the root of the problem remains.

Conflicts with a child

Mutual respect, recognition of positions, views and interests prevail here. Helps to find and analyze the sources of the dispute. And finally, let’s find out how to behave in conflict situations with children.

  1. Allow your child to speak out and release their emotions.
  2. Invite him to justify his opinion.
  3. Use tricks.
  4. Remind yourself of how you are feeling.
  5. Try to jointly find the cause of the dispute and the end result.
  6. Find starting points.
  7. Show your interest in resolving the conflict.
  8. Be calm, remain equal.
  9. Whatever the outcome, maintain good relationships.

The golden rule for resolving any dispute is competent control of your emotions. Always be calm. Resolve disagreements using logic and knowledge of psychological techniques. How to behave correctly in conflict situations with a child:

  • Don't be critical.
  • There is no need to see bad intentions in a child’s actions.
  • Showing superiority is prohibited.
  • Do not blame the child, thus relieving yourself of responsibility.
  • Don't ignore his interests.
  • Look at the situation through his eyes.
  • Don't show aggression, don't swear.
  • Don't put pressure on sore spots.

To avoid these mistakes, you need to learn the correct behavior in conflict situations.

Due to different characters, temperaments and opinions, controversial and conflict situations often occur between people. The conflict can be between people you know, relatives who love each other, or just colleagues. Psychologists note that conflicts are inherent in any person, there is nothing to worry about. It is only important to know how to behave in a conflict situation in order to end it painlessly and without losses.

The basis for conflicts is often minor disagreements and the inability of people to correctly resolve such situations. Due to emotionality, little awareness and wisdom, against the backdrop of small differences of opinion, people can inflate the conflict to large-scale proportions. There are also serious problems in which only a competent person can know how to get out of a conflict situation while maintaining favorable relationships.

Before looking for ways and means of how to behave correctly during a conflict in order to suppress it, it is worth becoming familiar with the concept and the reasons for its occurrence. In a literal translation, the word conflictus is translated as collided, from which we can conclude that conflict is an acute way of resolving confrontations of interests and opinions. Conflict always arises against the background of social interaction, which is inherent in all people.

Many experts note that a conflict is always a verbal influence on the part of several parties who express their position, belief, and opinion. The object of the conflict is the subject of the dispute, the subjects are opponents, groups, organizations. The scale can be interpersonal or global; much of its solution depends on the conditions, tactics and strategies of the parties.

Expert opinion

Victor Brenz

Psychologist and self-development expert

Any conflict is a complex, dynamic process consisting of several phases. This is the formation of objective reasons for this, that is, the objective situation between opponents, the second phase is the development of the incident during interaction, in the end the conflict ends with an absolute or partial solution.

Reasons for disagreement

It will be impossible for any opponent to emerge from the conflict without consequences if its causes and provoking factors are not analyzed. The nature of the conflict is actually true goal participants in communication, that is, the outcome of the collision. Psychologists note that the following circumstances may be the precursors of a controversial situation:

  • Objective reasons - they are usually associated with existing problems or shortcomings in a person.
  • Subjective reasons - these can be people’s assessments of actions, events, and other people.

Conflicts themselves can be destructive, that is, they act in a destructive manner without a chance of resolution and a favorable outcome, as well as constructive, which can provide for rational transformations of existing circumstances. If we consider in more detail, the most common causes of conflicts are judgments and condemnations of other people, assessments of actions and people in general, etc.

How to behave in a conflict situation depending on its type?

Psychologists primarily discuss how to emerge victorious from a conflict. Today, he often uses 5 conflict resolution strategies, namely:

  1. Avoiding a dispute– if a person does not have the time and energy to find a way out of a controversial situation, you can postpone the process of sorting out the relationship, giving both parties a chance to analyze the situation. This technique is especially relevant in resolving disputes with management at work, if a person does not see a solution, doubts that he is right, if the interlocutor is more persistent in proving his point of view, and agreeing with him would be an appropriate decision.
  2. Rivalry– openly defending one’s position is appropriate if being right is extremely important to both opponents. In order not to lose in an argument, it is important to behave correctly.
  3. Cooperation- this is the longest process leading to conflict resolution, if there is a desire to maintain good relations with the opponent, the parties are equal, there is time to resolve the dispute and there is mutual benefit in this.
  4. Device– it is permissible to give in to an opponent in a conflict if the dispute could otherwise become more serious, the issue is not fundamental for one side, the conflict arose with the management.
  5. Compromise– this situation provides an opportunity to prove one’s point of view, but subject to at least partial acceptance of the other side. This strategy is appropriate when the parties have equal rights, and it is also important for both parties to maintain a favorable relationship.

After this, you can move on to the second stage of conflict resolution. Psychologists advise following several rules:

  • be open in front of your opponent, do not clasp your hands on your chest;
  • try not to glare at your interlocutor with an angry and intent gaze;
  • control intonation, facial expressions and manner of speaking;
  • you should beware of harsh and premature assessments of your opponent’s opinion;
  • it is important not to interrupt, but to hear each other;
  • when the opponent expresses his point of view, it is important to show his attitude, and not his assessment of it;
  • you should not show defiant intellectual superiority;
  • in order to reduce the degree of dispute, you can briefly divert the vector of the conflict in the other direction.

Allies of self-confident and wise man there must be balance and calm; psychologists even recommend such a technique as pauses during a conversation in order to suppress emotional outbursts. Arguments and clear formulation of speech will simplify the process of mutual understanding between people.

How to get out of conflict at work?

As a rule, the desire to get out of a conflict without resolving it is a tactic that is appropriate when there is inequality between the parties, for example, when working with management. In this regard, psychologists recommend adhering to simple rules, how best to suppress the conflict without consequences for both sides, namely:

  • do not rush to answer - it is better to think carefully before every word spoken;
  • you need to think not only about yourself, but also about the feelings of your opponent - this will reduce the degree of aggression;
  • control over speech speed, intonation and volume - you need to speak measuredly, calmly, without unnecessary emotions;
  • respite - if you take a time out during the height of a conflict, this will help calm both parties down;
  • refusal of risk - you should not go all-in with weighty arguments, risking your position at work and relationships with your opponent;
  • orientation towards results - during a dispute, it is worth remembering what goals are being pursued by the parties, and not how to offend and offend the opponent more.

Do you know how to avoid conflicts?

YesNo

Psychologists advise paying attention to your emotional state, trying not to succumb to provocative “lures” and words that are aimed at unbalancing a person. You shouldn’t respond to a blow with a blow; it’s better to simply hush up the conflict so as not to aggravate the situation. After some time, the passions will subside, and the solution will appear on the surface on its own.

How to get out of a conflict: a reminder

To summarize, experts offer a top list of the most simple ways conflict resolution. The memo consists of only a few points, namely:

  • recognition of a conflict situation;
  • agreement to negotiate face to face or with the help of an intermediary;
  • identification of the subject of confrontation and points of contact;
  • development of several optimal options for resolving the conflict without damage to both parties;
  • written confirmation that the conflict will be resolved voluntarily in one way or another;
  • implementation and translation into reality of mutually accepted decisions.

Such conflict resolution scenarios are practiced in life not only against the backdrop of everyday disputes, but also in a legally certified way with the help of a notary. Psychologists consider this method to be most appropriate between business partners, work colleagues, management and subordinates, and in interpersonal relationships.

Conclusion

Each person is so individual that he can have his own and not similar opinion, point of view or views. Due to different mindsets, types of character and temperament, disputes and conflicts may arise. They can be solved competently without negative consequences, if you have the skills and abilities. Leading psychologists share how to behave correctly in such situations.

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