Date: 2014-03-24
Hello site readers.
Judging by the title, it is clear that we will talk about how to stop thinking about bad things. There are similar articles that you can also read: and and. I'm sure you need to read them first before you start reading this article. They contain the very first and most effective techniques that will help you later. don't think about bad things.
Why did I decide to write this article? This desire was awakened by my brother, who is 95% set on a negative outcome. Unfortunately, he became a real pessimist. You've probably heard a saying like: "Hope for the best, prepare for the worst". My older brother always adheres to this advice, only he sounds it differently: “Always prepare for shit.” And then nothing follows. That is, there is no positive outcome at all. I also heard this expression: “A loser thinks about what he will do if he succeeds, and a successful man thinks about what he will do if he doesn’t succeed.”. I do not agree with this statement and do not believe that it should be followed. It would be correct if a person thinks about both options. There should always be a backup option.
My brother, like other people, forgot how to be positive because they failed so many times. Why hope for the best if it turns out as always? Negative experiences turn off the human ability to tune in to the positive. This means that you need to deal with it first. I wrote how to do this in the two articles that I gave you at the beginning.
How not to think about bad things?
The first way is to expect nothing from specific situation. If you don’t expect anything, then you won’t be upset if you fail. This method is the most difficult, because not expecting anything is very difficult. This can only be achieved in the case of reduced importance. That is, in order to expect nothing, you need to reduce the importance of the outcome to the maximum. And to reduce the importance, you need to change your attitude towards the future outcome. Insurance (backup plan) helps reduce the importance. The more of them you have, the better for you.
Without concrete example I won't leave you. For example, a person has found a job that suits him and is preparing for an interview. Of course, he worries, thinks, what if they don’t take him, what will happen if they don’t take him, what if he doesn’t make the proper first impression, and so on. Such thoughts make a person tune in to a negative outcome, that is, he will be denied a position. A person holds on to this position and therefore he shakes like jelly. But if he has two or three more vacancies in mind, then he won’t be so afraid. Plan A doesn’t work, so he uses plan B, and then, if something happens, plan C.
Another similar example. The guy started dating a girl and became addicted. He is afraid of losing her, because he believes that he will not be able to find another girl. And so, thinking about bad things, he starts calling her, being jealous of every post, checking her mail, phone, and so on. Such actions are destructive and she will leave him soon. But he wouldn’t behave like that if he knew how to meet and seduce girls. He would think like this: “If this girl behaves badly, then I will seduce another and date her.” Thinking this way, he behaves completely differently, namely, he does not call, does not spy and is not jealous.
This is the beauty of a backup plan, which reduces the level of fear of failure to a minimum. And if you want to set yourself up for the positive, then you need to have a backup plan. This is the best way to calm yourself and stop thinking about bad things.
How to stop thinking about bad things?
A person begins to think badly when someone offended him, when he was touched to the quick. In the first part of the article, I talked about how to calm yourself before any important event. But what should a person who has been offended do? I myself very often begin to think badly about a person when he has offended me. What is resentment? A person gets offended by other people when they do not treat him the way he wants. For example, someone does not pay attention, someone is not too polite, someone behaves too indifferently, and so on. I have been offended many times by those people who behaved indifferently towards me. And as a result, I thought badly of them and hated them. This means that they meant something to me, otherwise I would not be offended by them and their behavior.
In this case, humility will help. Coming to terms with any situation can be extremely difficult. Sometimes it takes a long time to do this. While emotions are in full swing, it is unlikely that you will be able to come to terms with any situation.
For example, a person was demoted or his salary was cut. Do you agree with me that it will be difficult to come to terms with this instantly? Of course, a person will begin to think badly about his superiors, will begin to wish hellish harm on them, thoughts will begin to flash in his head terrible thoughts(for example, a person will imagine how he kills them). It's normal to be angry (thoughts of murder). Later, when time will pass and the emotions will subside, the person will stop thinking about bad things and hating everyone and everything. And all because he will come to terms with this situation. Hence the conclusion: in order to stop thinking about bad things, you need to come to terms with the situation. I warn you: humility comes with time.
Many people start thinking about bad things when they start remembering their past. There is a category of people who live in the past. A person remembers a negative situation and begins to radiate complete negativity. Other people, on the contrary, begin to imagine a negative scenario in all its manifestations. If he does this, then I will tell him like this, or I will do such and such a mean thing. Well, isn't this familiar to you? A person either thinks badly about the past, or begins to imagine a negative scenario even before the incident.
Regarding the past, I can only say that it is definitely worth coming to terms with. I myself do not return to the past and do not remember it. Regarding the second situation, even I have a similar behavior. For example, if she doesn't start paying attention to me, I will start to behave badly. Or I'll start talking rudely. Her indifference hurts me, which means I will answer her in kind. And such thoughts plunge me into a bad movie with a negative script and outcome because I was hurt, I was offended. A person allows himself to be offended. And in order to stop thinking about the bad, you should switch your attention. I switch my attention when I start looking for a way out of a situation or understanding myself. Having understood the cause of bad thoughts, a person is able to get rid of negative thoughts and stop thinking about bad things. There is no need to sit in a cave and whine that you are lost. We need to look for a way out of the cave.
Thoughts are material! And when we think about bad things, we reinforce the bad things in our lives. The law of attraction applies here. What we replay in our minds comes to fruition. Therefore, it is important to learn to keep the right thoughts in your mind that will program a positive future.
How to do it? It is important to monitor your thoughts and find replacements for them. For example, during the day you often catch yourself thinking that you are a loser. And this spoils your mood and blocks your actions.
Then the pill for this negative thought program will be the thought that you are a winner, that you respect yourself for this! Whenever you catch yourself thinking about bad things, switch to your new good beliefs! And this will help you change your thinking in a good direction.
What to do to avoid thinking about bad things
Here are some more ideas:
1.When you are overwhelmed by negativity, sit down and start writing it down on paper. Write down everything that worries you. Do this until the bad thoughts exhaust themselves. Then tear the leaf. And on the new one, start writing down good thoughts, create good scripts.
2. Learning to stop the internal dialogue. For this you can use, for example. And after 20 minutes of this practice, feel free to program your mind with new positive ideas.
3. Switch to gratitude. Start saying or writing down all the good things you are grateful for. This will help change the wave and tune in to good vibrations.
4. If you are surrounded by negative people, get away from them. It is often difficult to disengage from everyone and not absorb the worst. So get away from the negativity. Take a walk. One hour of walking is a great cure for negative thoughts!
5. Exercise. They help you stop thinking about bad things.
A person cannot live his life serenely, without experiencing sadness, disappointment, grief. It is difficult to avoid situations that serve as a source of personal suffering, disappointment, and tragedy, real or imagined. Events that cause negative emotions force a person, mentally returning to such events, to relive and evaluate his actions, words, and emotions. This is natural in human behavior if such experiences and negative thoughts do not become dominant and do not interfere with a full life. If this happens and the negative thoughts persist day after day, it's time to worry.
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Every person has bad thoughts, even if he looks confident and prosperous. You need to stop spinning negative thoughts and remove the reasons why they arise:
- Self-doubt, indecision. In life, you constantly have to make decisions and make choices. Ordinary, insignificant things are easy to accept. What to eat for breakfast, what movie to watch. They do not affect the usual way of life Everyday life. But decisions that involve choice and responsibility force a person to analyze and weigh all the pros and cons of the consequences. The desire for change and the fear of its occurrence with the accompanying problems again and again force us to think and doubt, giving us no peace.
- Remorse. No one is immune from mistakes. It's simply not possible to always do the right thing. Those who understand this learn a lesson from what happened and move on. Other people continue to live in the past, replaying the situation and options for possible actions. With their minds they understand that everything has already happened and nothing can be corrected, but with their thoughts they return to the past again. The feeling of guilt does not let go and destroys the psyche.
- Impotence. Not all problems can be solved, not everything can be changed for the better. We must learn to perceive everything as it is and live with it. Sometimes you give up from powerlessness, and the future seems scary and gloomy. Obsessive, bad thoughts are destructive in nature, and regardless of the reasons for their occurrence, we must learn to block them, get rid of them before we plunge into deep depression.
Consequences
Not many people understand the danger of negative thoughts, because they do not interfere with the external aspects of life. If you don’t stop the “soul-searching” in time on your own or with the help of a psychologist, then the person first becomes depressed, then neurosis begins. This could end in a psychiatric hospital.
Negative thinking not only destroys the psyche, it also:
- 1. Affects the adequacy of actions and actions. In a depressed state, immersed in negative thoughts, a person is incapable of correctly perceiving events occurring around him and choosing behavior appropriate to the situation.
- 2. Generates diseases. Psychological syndromes and phobias do not arise out of nowhere. Constantly overthinking yourself with negative thoughts and unwillingness to change your way of thinking lead to serious mental illness. Leads to a constant fear of contracting an incurable disease. Thoughts about this do not let go and force you to look for symptoms of diseases, make an appointment with a doctor, disinfect your home, and constantly talk about diseases with others.
- 3. Can materialize. The thought is material. Constant thoughts about bad things, illness or accidents sooner or later happen in reality. The disease is diagnosed, and disaster happens.
- 4. Becomes an addiction. Negative thoughts are intrusive and difficult to get rid of on your own. A psychologist will help with this, but he will also be powerless if the patient does not want to understand the reasons for the occurrence of bad thoughts.
- 5. Changes behavioral manifestations in people prone to obsessive thoughts.
- 6. Provokes anxious behavior, constant emotional stress due to dangers threatening them or loved ones, often unreasonable and far-fetched.
- 7. Leads to inflated demands on oneself and especially on others. Such people are often very pious. Any discrepancy with the chosen ideal leads them to depression.
- 8. Calls for living in the “past.” In the present, such people are uncomfortable. They carefully store things and symbols past life. If some of the things are lost or someone throws them away, they become depressed again.
- 9. teaches you to see the bad in everything, especially in situations that deviate from the established routine of life.
This behavior complicates the life of those around him and especially those close to him and demonstrates obvious symptoms of the disease.
The success of treatment depends on correct determination of the cause of the disease. This applies equally to psychological problems. You need to try in a calm environment to remember what caused such thoughts. Take a look at the situation from the “side” and evaluate how adequate the response to the problem that arose was. To successfully combat negative thoughts, psychologists advise:
- 1. Do not allow negative emotions into yourself. Do not discuss news programs, watch less TV. Books, flowers, drawing, embroidery - any hobby to calm the soul. It’s worth changing your social circle. Passionate, optimistic people will help cope with any depression.
- 2. Use self-hypnosis. Write down all your tormenting fears, doubts, and bad thoughts on a piece of paper. Re-read. Convince yourself that everything bad was transferred to paper. Burn it, grind the ashes and wash off with running water.
- 3. Love yourself and praise yourself. Only the person himself is responsible for himself and his life. You need to set realistic goals and achieve them. Don’t forget to praise yourself for this, and your fears will go away.
- 4. Learn to switch. Negative thoughts came, fear appeared - to think about pleasant things. A meeting with a loved one, a house on the shore of a pond, anything that lifts your spirits and helps you take your mind off things.
You can stop thinking bad thoughts and treat your emotional sphere at home. The main thing is to find something you like. And then nothing unnecessary will come into your head.
Surely everyone is familiar with the situation when even the slightest problem swells somewhere in the subcortex of the brain to cosmic proportions. Yes, sometimes the subconscious produces inexplicable pictures, depressing and sad, and it seems that frustration cannot be avoided. But how often have your fears come true? And if not, then why waste your nerves and undermine your health day by day? Learn to think positively, send only good energy into space, and you will notice how the world around you begins to change. Well, if it seems to you that your life is going downhill, then read this and don’t lose heart!
So, when “reinforced concrete” arguments like “everything will be fine, don’t take it to heart” do not work, we have compiled the top 5 tips on how to calm down, get rid of bad thoughts and live with a light heart.
Look for the positives
Look at the circumstances soberly and think about what positive outcome can await you. After all, nothing has happened yet, so there is a chance that nothing will happen! Call on logic to help and try to reassure yourself that everything is under control. And to prove it, give several weighty arguments in your favor. You'll see, the unreasonable excitement will immediately dissipate.
There's always a plan B
If you feel that trouble is imminent, and the feeling of anxiety is inexorably growing, come up with a backup plan for your further actions. For example, if you are always worried that your significant other will leave you, then controlling and throwing tantrums is not the solution. Just instill in yourself the confidence that if the ending is unfavorable, you can easily find an even better partner and be happy, no matter what. This belief will add confidence and eliminate excessive anxiety!
Practice
Does your brain inevitably become clogged with not the most cheerful thoughts? Do 20 squats, push-ups, pull-ups... In general, any possible physical activity. If you are in the office, you can quickly clench and unclench your hands into fists. All this will allow you to abstract from the bad and overcome panic, and the released adrenaline hormone will even lift your spirits!
take a shower
And better contrast. Alternating hot and cold water will relieve you of unnecessary thoughts and help you come to your senses quite quickly. If you don’t have a shower at hand, it’s enough to wash your face with ice water several times. After this procedure you will feel much better! Especially, this method saves in critical cases.
Turn off the right hemisphere
It's simple. Take a chain or rosary in your right hand and twist them for about 10 minutes. Soon the left hemisphere will begin to wake up, with the help of which you can quickly switch to a good mood. The main thing is to forget about your problem at this moment and think about something distant.
